Nonlinear Arcovazzi equation

Ventris onus misero, nec te pudet, excipis auro, Basse, bibis vitro: carius ergo cacas. You’ve a golden pot for your arse But you drink your wine from glass— You value your stink Far more than your drink. Per andare di corpo hai vasi d’oro, o Basso, e tu non ti vergogni, ma bevi in vetri senza alcun decoro. Conta di più per te, e questo agogni, cagare con dovizia i tuoi bisogni.

Martial, Epigrams, Book 1, XXXVII
English translation by Olive Pitt-Kethley
Italian translation by Franco Zagato

Displaying above book shelf type French toilet and colorfully decorated Victorian period toilet. Photo courtesy of Sulabh International Museum of Toilets, Delhi, India.